Secrets of “Being Everything”
Hello hello and welcome back to Spill Season Pod. I am your host Savannah and on today’s episode we are going to talk about the hidden secrets behind trying to be everything in society. To start, I think we should first discuss what it means to “be everything” or a phrase I’ve also seen used is “Performative living”. Meaning a person living to be seen rather than to be fulfilled or discovering what’s personal or their own voice.
It’s not at all surprising since we have social media and we are constantly inundated with videos of creators sharing their day to day life, activities and hobbies and it’s always changing. Some use phrases “Clean Girl Must Haves” or “Only Cool Girls Do These 5 Things” etc to draw attention, which in turn makes the viewer feel as though they are missing something to belong. It’s a great marketing tactic but underneath that, it can become damaging to the viewer. Why?
Watching social media creators can cause significant mental health issues, including increased anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem, often fueled by negative social comparison and curated, unrealistic portrayals of life. Users frequently experience FOMO (fear of missing out), addictive behaviors, and "brain rot" (short-term cognitive fatigue) from constant, rapid-fire, and algorithm-driven content. Even Influencers have spoken up about the battle of mental health while promoting their content on social media.
Amanda Yarnell, senior director of the Center for Health Communication at Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health said in an interview about a case study, “This survey reveals the pressures that come alongside those responsibilities: The financial pressure. The obsession over content performance. The burnout. The constant toxicity. And the isolation.”
The research Amanda referred to can be found on Net Influencer titled “Content Creators Twice As Likely To Experience Suicidal Thoughts As General Population, Study Finds” which said:
“A new study released by Creators 4 Mental Health (C4MH) and Lupiani Insights & Strategies finds content creators experiencing mental health challenges at rates significantly higher than the general population, highlighting urgent concerns in this growing workforce sector. The research, which surveyed 542 North American content creators, reveals that 10% of creators report experiencing suicidal thoughts connected to their work – nearly double the 5.5% rate observed in the general U.S. adult population according to National Institutes of Health data. The study shows widespread mental health struggles among creators, with 52% reporting anxiety, 35% experiencing depression, and 62% facing burnout sometimes or often. Perhaps most telling is that 43% report feeling isolated, despite maintaining a social presence. “You’re surrounded by comments, but no one actually sees you,” one creator noted in the report, highlighting the paradoxical isolation many experience despite their public-facing work.”
Another article hinted at another issue that plays a role and that is “imposter syndrome”. It said this in regards to the “imposter syndrome cycle”: “The process begins when people overwork or over-function to compensate for a fear of being discovered as a fraud. Although such efforts often lead to stellar grades or high performance, the person with impostor syndrome will temporarily feel better and is likely to quickly feel like a fraud again. They will feel compelled to overwork and start the cycle anew. Another hallmark of the impostor syndrome cycle involves responding negatively to others’ positive feedback. For example, when people with impostor syndrome accomplish a task they’ve set out to achieve, they tend to disregard compliments.”
Clearly there is something here with regards to over consumption of social media that I think is not nearly talked about enough. Why is that? Perhaps there is shame from some that don’t want to admit that something could be damaging to their mental health? Or maybe it’s because social media drives well over $200 billion dollars from ads and marketing each year? Whatever the case may be, this is certainly something that needs to be talked about more.
The next question is, how can we remedy this? Or at least, how as individuals, and consumers of social media, help ourselves by lessening the mental overload?
On Deconstructing Stigma an article titled “Scrolling and Stress: The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health” said this: “A 2018 University of Pennsylvania study suggests that such self-monitoring can change one’s perception of social media. The study’s researchers looked at 143 undergraduates randomly assigned to two groups. The first set was asked to limit Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat to 10 minutes per platform per day, while the second was asked to continue to use their social media as usual for three weeks. The limited group showed significant reductions in loneliness and depression during those three weeks over the group that continued using social media without time limits.”
In an article on Substack by Amber titled “The Hunger To Be Everything” she wrote: “They said choice would taste like freedom, but not that it’s an addictive sweetness. One that rots the stomach, until even our gut-instincts lose their sense of direction. We do not just suffer from an abundance of options, we suffer from a lack of commitment.”
Clearly this is telling us that the best way to clear out the noise is to set limitations to viewing. There are apps like Opal, Freedom, and AppBlock, which allow users to block distracting apps, set, and enforce daily limits. Other effective options include Forest for focus-based, gamified limiting, ScreenZen for reducing compulsive scrolling, and Flipd for locking apps entirely. There’s even cell phone settings on certain phones that have built-in options like Do Not Disturb and Reduce Distractions so you can focus on other things like building hobbies or spending time with your friends and family socializing. And research is showing that within a relatively short time improvements were already made by setting limits!
So for this week's challenge I want to challenge all listeners that for 30 days set a limit to your social media intake. Record perhaps your feelings and state of mind at the end of 30 days and if you would like to share your results feel free to either send a direct email to spillseasonpod@gmail.com OR you can visit my website at www.spillseason.com and click on Share Your Story.
This episode did briefly mention suicide. If you or anyone you know is experiencing thoughts of suicide or a mental health crisis you are not alone! Dial 9-8-8 for help.
Thank you all so much for listening. See you all next week!
Episode Sources:
https://hsph.harvard.edu/news/content-creators-are-struggling-with-mental-health-study-finds/
https://deconstructingstigma.org/guides/social-media
https://deconstructingstigma.org/guides/impostor-syndrome
https://odetoapoet.substack.com/p/the-hunger-to-be-everything